Be your own voice

It is okay to speak up for yourself. Do not delegate that task to anyone else. Who better to express what your are feeling than you? It may seem intimidating but it’s better to be your own voice than to have someone speak on your behalf. This way, the message you want to deliver is not misconstrued or misinterpreted. You are able to say exactly what you want to and exactly how you want to say it. Remember to be your own voice, speak up.

New Love

May be we should kiss a little…
First time could be awkward but the bittersweet taste of your moist lips would ship it off to sea.

Maybe we should kiss a little…
my arms around your neck, lips part, tongues touch, bonjour with a minty taste.

Maybe we should kiss a little…
You’d throw in a little tickle, I’d laugh so hard… maybe try to run.. Hehe
You’ll lift me up in your arms, hold me tight and rub my back…
Bliss, you’re my lucky charm…

Maybe we should kiss a little because you’re right here by my side. You’re sexy, I’m weak.
It is simple, you blow my mind.

Now we are bored, nothing to do. We’re done with the laughs, done with the giggles and tickles. I’m stuck, dreamy-eyed and dimples.
You read my mind, I read yours.
You’re so divine, I’d sing songs…
You hear the chords of my songs, they hit yours…

We give in to emotions, pleasure, lift-off…
So we kissed a little…

The “F” word

It is so powerful. It can physically and mentally immobilize you, get your heart racing, sweaty palms and all. The word is fear. It refrains us from trying new things or taking life-changing steps. We feed this until it completely paralyzes us. If the word you were thinking of is fear, you are absolutely right.

You know that guy you always run into when you go for your morning jog. You have run into each other for almost a year now. You like him a lot and look forward to every morning because of him. You also know that he is single. You have come to know that he is kind, educated, down to earth and a proper gentleman. You want to ask him out. Instead of thinking of all the good ways this could go, you let fear prevent you from what could be the most beautiful relationship you could have. You think of all the horrible ways this could go like what if he doesn’t like you like that? What if this ends badly? So now you torture yourself with all these “what ifs”. You end up missing out because fear got in the way. May be you want to relocate to a new state, start a business because you hate the 9-5 routine, try bungee jumping, travel to see the world or even apply for that promotion you’ve been dreaming off.

Let go of your fear and watch how amazing your life will become. If you are reading this, try something new today, you might be pleasantly suprised. If you live in fear you only live half your life. Do not fear failure, but be terrified of regret. Go out there and live your best live. The fear may not go away, you might just have to do it scared. What has fear prevented you from doing lately? Kindly share in the comments below.

Continue reading The “F” word

Have you heard about the Sande society?

The Secret Society of the Sande Women

The Bundu helmet mask which is sometimes called the Mende or Sowei mask is a type of mask worn by the Sande female society in Sub-Saharan Africa during solemn rituals or ceremonies. Most masquerade or masks are worn by men.  The Sande women are the only women in Sub-Saharan African allowed to wear mask during ceremonial activities or rituals. However, Sande officials commission male carvers to make the mask in secret. The Bundu helmet mask is especially used during initiation rites or puberty rites. This is a coming of age ceremony for girls to become women. The mask can only be worn by women who have certain standing or position within the society. These women receive the initiates at the end of a three-month reclusion in the forest.

            The mask represents an ideal of feminine beauty admired by the Mendes. These ideals include a full forehead, elaborate headdress or hairstyles and small facial feature. Each characteristic of the mask has a symbolic meaning associated with it. The shiny surface of the mask is a representation of healthy and glowing skin; this happens when the mask is anointed with palm oil (modern carvers use black shoe polish to get that shine). The mouth is made small to teach the initiates (girls) not to gossip. The ears are also made small to teach the initiates not to eavesdrop. The neck has deep incised lines which is considered marks of beauty and a promise of proliferation. The neck is also made broad so it could fit the person who wears it.

            The mask is worn with a costume made of thick cotton covered with raffia which has been dyed black. The sacredness of the mask and complete costume is seen as a representation of the long deceased founder of the Sande society. The wearer also has to be an official of Sande society and very good dancer, who can dance in the heavy costume for over two hours. The dance moves are also symbolic. It is said that the spirits that possess the wearer send messages in the form of the dancing. The messages sent in the puberty rituals is to teach the girls what they need to know for womanhood.

What ceremonial practices do you know of? Have you ever witnessed one? What are your thoughts on these traditions?